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People seem excited about Modern Times. I get lots of emails from eager strangers, and we’ve amassed an impressive number of Likes, Twitter followers, & email newsletter subscribers. Embarrassingly, I even get recognized at some local beer bars now. All without having beer to sell!

During tours of the Lomaland Fermentorium and at our pilot tastings, folks have told me that they like the transparency, honesty, and self-deprecating humor with which I’ve talked about the ups-and-downs of starting the brewery. So I’m going to keep doing it.

But here’s something I will never, ever do: hire an ad agency or marketing firm. This is not totally unique to Modern Times, of course; I was eager to work at Stone in part due to Greg’s longstanding and noble disdain for beer advertising.

I could explain my carefully considered reasons for making this choice, or I could just include a link to this article, which inadvertently—but very effectively—communicates why the entire advertising industry should be sold for scrap.

Let’s make a list of the obnoxious and suicide-inducing elements of this article, which are plainly indicative of the ad industry’s odious fetishization of communication.

  1. Fundamentally worthless product? Check
  2. Attempt to differentiate said product with groan-inducing clichés? Check
  3. Trade journalism that treats a morally bankrupt attempt to differentiate a fundamentally worthless product using groan-inducing clichés as a noteworthy event? Check
  4. Nauseating and profoundly far-fetched use of buzzwords “upcycle” & “disrupt” (pukes in hat, jumps off bridge)? Check

Rereading that article one more time will be too much for me, so I’ll stop the list at 4.

Anyway, we’re never going to advertise.

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